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15 insightful conversations with leading professionals on trauma and abuse

Expert Interviews | 2021

Sarah McDugal chats with expert authors, advocates, and leading practitioners on topics related to abuse and trauma recovery. 

Experts include guests such as:
  • Judge Rosemarie Aquilina
  • Sheila Wray Gregoire
  • Psalm 82 Initiative 
  • Joy Forrest
  • Tina Swithin
  • and so many more!

with your trainer...

Sarah McDugal

Author, speaker, abuse recovery coach, and co-founder of WILD & TraumaMAMAs.
WILD cultivates community for women healing after betrayal trauma and intimate terrorism. 

Guiding women out of the wilderness,
into the WILD. 

Contents

Ep1 | The Four Tools of Abuse | Psalm 82 Initiative


Ep1 | Video
Ep1 | Show Notes

Ep2 | How to Raise Your Voice After Abuse | Judge Rosemarie Aquilina

Did you watch Larry Nassar's sentencing and think...


"...that judge is my new hero!"

Cause I sure did! Seeing someone in a position of authority use their power for justice brought healing just by watching from the sidelines.

I'm thrilled to invite you to join me for virtual coffee and conversation with Judge Rosemarie Aquilina!

We'll be chatting about: 
  • pursuing truth and justice even when it's unpopular
  • ways to raise your voice after abuse
  • how you can advocate for change in your community
  • what you can do to hold your elected officials accountable 
  • and SO MUCH MORE!!!
Eeeeeeek
Can you tell I'm excited?

Ep2 | Video
Ep2 | Show Notes

Ep3 | How Churches Should Respond to Abuse | Joy Forrest

Do you wish your church knew how to recognize and respond to abuse more effectively?


If you've experienced Double Abuse, you may already know that:
  • most clergy aren't trained to recognize abuse, 
  • many belief systems actually support domestic violence instead of stopping it,  
  • even well-meaning helpers can unwittingly cause more harm when they try to help.

I'm thrilled to invite you to join me for virtual coffee and conversation with Joy Forrest, from Called to Peace Ministries!

We'll chat about:
  • the prevalence of Domestic Violence (DV) in the church,
  • some of the "Christian" mindsets and worldviews that create an atmosphere for abuse to thrive,
  • what Scripture says about God's feelings regarding abuse,
  • why "airing the church's dirty laundry" isn't something to worry about,
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep3 | Video
Ep3 | Show Notes

Ep4 | Addressing the "Narcissism" Controversy | Joy Forrest

Did you feel a wave of relief when you discovered that the abuse you experienced was actually a thing?


When you first learned that:
  • you're not alone, 
  • what you've been living with has a name (or three),  
  • there were terms and descriptions and even psychiatric diagnoses that clearly described the crazy...
  • did it feel like you'd just been handed a lifeline?

But have you also felt frustration when you see people slapping "narc" labels on every person they don't get along with?

Have you joined victim support groups where every third post seems like an angry rant peppered with claims of this personality disorder or that one?

Have you ever wondered if it's possible that calling everyone a "narc" will eventually over-saturate the abuse vocabulary?

I'm thrilled to invite you to join me for virtual coffee and conversation with Joy Forrest!

We'll be chatting about: 
  • how psychiatric descriptions can help survivors gain insight,
  • reasons survivors actually benefit from avoiding describing their abusers using diagnostic terms,
  • how using labels in family court can harmfully backfire,
  • why it's inaccurate to assume that every abuser has a mental illness,
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep4 | Video
Ep4 | Show Notes

Ep5 | Toxic Evangelical Sex | Sheila Wray Gregoire

Which Bestselling Christian Marriage Books are Killing Sex?


Join Sarah McDugal and Sheila Wray Gregoire, from the Bare Marriagepodcast, for a LIVE interactive Zoom chat about the latest research about Christian marriage books and... well... how they negatively impact actual Christian marriages!

I'm thrilled to invite you to join me for virtual coffee and conversation with Sheila Wray Gregoire, bestselling author of The Great Sex Rescue: The Lies You've Been Taught and How to Recover What God Intended. 

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this incredible conversation!

We'll chat about:
  • popular but toxic evangelical teachings about sex and marriage.
  • Sheila's survey of 20,000 women--the largest survey in history, measuring Christian women's marital & sexual satisfaction.
  • the 47% orgasm gap between husbands and wives, and 4 common evangelical beliefs that contribute to it.
  • why Christian wives have twice the rate of sexual pain as the general population.
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep5 | Video
Ep5 | Show Notes

Ep6 | Surviving Post-Separation Abuse | Tina Swithin

What Happens When You Already Left, but the Abuse Doesn't Stop?


Join Sarah McDugal and Tina Swithin, founder of One Mom’s Battle, for a live interactive Zoom chat on how to survive post-separation abuse.

We'll chat about:
  • the intersection between domestic violence and family court.
  • why so many legal professionals don't recognize the signs of abuse.
  • how to protect yourself and your kids when the abuse doesn't stop after you left. 
  • where parental alienation originated, and why it's junk science.
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

I'm thrilled to invite you to join me for virtual coffee and conversation with Tina Swithin, author of Divorcing a Narcissist (series), founder of One Mom’s Battle and the High Conflict Divorce Coach Certification Program

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this incredible conversation!

If you're a mother with children, escaping abuse, this is stuff you NEED to know!

Ep6 | Video
Ep6 | Show Notes

Ep7 | You're Not #TraumaBonded, Here's Why | Anne Blythe

You’re Not #TraumaBonded, You’re Relationally Tethered. Here's how to break it...


Join Sarah McDugal and Anne Blythe, CEO of Betrayal Trauma Recovery, for a live interactive Zoom chat on why the term "trauma bonding" can actually be victim-blaming.

We'll chat about:
  • a trauma-informed way to better understand your attachment to your abuser.
  • why you feel tethered to the person who caused you harm.
  • how you can overcome and begin to heal.
  • where you can access live, worldwide, round-the-clock, crisis coaching support after discovering betrayal in your marriage.
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Anne Blythe, M.Ed, attempted to stop her husband’s pornography use and “anger issues” for years, but all her efforts abruptly halted when he was arrested in 2015. Anne educates women about how to safely and effectively navigate their husband’s (or ex’s) psychological abuse and sexual coercion and establish peace in their homes and families. 

Anne is the producer and host of the Betrayal Trauma Recovery Podcast

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this incredible conversation!

Ep7 | Video
Ep7 | Show Notes

Ep8 | Sex, Shame, and Purity Culture | Sheila Gregoire, Rebecca Lindenbach, Kensley Behel

If We're Totally Reframing Sex... Um, How Are We Going to Handle Shame?


Join Sarah McDugal for a no-holds-barred conversation about sex and shame with this incredible panel:

We'll be answering questions such as:
  • what is the godly, biblical, sacred definition of sexual intimacy? Is it more than technical penetration, and why?
  • if God created sex to be so much more than just penetration... then, whoa... wait... does that mean for all the young people who did everything except technically have sex?
  • were they still virgins when they got married? What repercussions does this potentially have?
  • does virginity mean as much as the Christian culture has taught that it does? Why or why not? 
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Sheila and Rebecca's pivotal book The Great Sex Rescue: The Lies You've Been Taught and How to Recover What God Intended breaks down data from the largest study of its kind (22,000 Christian women!), outlines the most damaging evangelical teachings about sex, and highlights a whole new way to experience passion and intimacy.

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this mind-blowing conversation!

It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep8 | Video
Ep8 | Show Notes

Ep9 | Breaking the Silence Through Art | Patrisha McLean

Can Art Help Survivors Find Their Voices Again?


Join Sarah McDugal and Patrisha McLean, founder of Finding Our Voices,for a live interactive Zoom chat on breaking the silence through art.

We'll chat about:
  • Patrisha's personal story of leaving domestic violence.
  • how art and photography can help survivors break the silence.
  • ways you can promote systemic change for justice.
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Patrisha McLean is a Maine-based photojournalist, women’s-rights advocate, and founder/president of Finding Our Voices, a survivor-led, grassroots non-profit breaking the silence of domestic abuse. Patrisha is an author of three books, and her photographs are in the permanent collections of two museums. 

Finding Our Voices gives women a platform to share their stories of dating/domestic abuse in order to help girls and women recognize, avoid, safely leave and heal from dangerous relationships, and to promote systemic change for justice and accountability. 

Patrisha takes portraits of survivors and has the women customize the power and control wheel according to their experience of abuse, and distributes/exhibits these as bold downtown business window posters and bookmarks shared by police, food pantries, bookstores, libraries and retail establishments. She also hosts a weekly online, private, sister-support chat; a public, domestic violence book club; and is launching a podcast. 

>>Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this incredible conversation!

Ep9 | Video
Ep9 | Show Notes

Ep10 | Safe Relationships After Trauma | Leslie Vernick

How on earth do I trust after trauma?


Join Sarah McDugal and Leslie Vernick for a LIVE chat about friendships, trauma, and trusting again -- at He Makes All Things New 2021 Women's Retreat.

We'll be answering questions such as:
  • is there a way to change how I think about friendships, to avoid being let down again?
  • what can I do to become a healthy friend to others? 
  • how can I discern whether someone is a safe and trustworthy person to invest in?
  • where do I find people I really relate to and surround myself with a tribe I can trust?
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Leslie Vernick has been helping individuals, couples and families heal, rebuild or grow their relationships for more than 35 years. Growing up in a broken home with an abusive mom, Leslie learned firsthand how difficult it can be to act in a Christ-like way with a destructive person.

Whether coaching, speaking or writing, Leslie gently leads people to make real changes in their lives. She loves to help women learn to:
•   Confidently speak their own thoughts and feelings in a constructive way.
•   Encounter God’s peace and presence in the midst of suffering or difficult loss.
•   Develop the discipline to turn dreams and desires into reality

Leslie is the author of seven books, including the best selling, The Emotionally Destructive Marriage and The Emotionally Destructive Relationship

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink and curl up with us! It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep10 | Video
Ep10 | Show Notes

Ep11 | What Makes a Sexually Healthy Man? | Andrew Bauman

What is a sexually healthy man? How can you tell if a man is good + safe?


Join Sarah McDugal and Andrew Bauman for a honest, no-frills conversation about what sexually healthy masculinity looks like. 

We'll be answering questions such as:
  • what are the traits of a sexually healthy man? how does that look in real life?
  • can porn use co-exist with being sexually healthy?
  • how can I safely address the situation if I'm realizing my partner is not sexually healthy? 
  • what kind of counseling or therapy work needs to be done in order to become a sexually healthy man?
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Andrew J. Bauman is the Co-Founder & Director of the Christian Counseling Center: For Sexual Health & Trauma (CCC). He is a licensed mental health counselor with a Master of Arts in Counseling Psychology from The Seattle School of Theology & Psychology, and  spent 10 years studying under Dr. Dan Allender. 

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this mind-blowing conversation!
It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep11 | Video
Ep11 | Show Notes

Ep12 | Do Men Actually "NEED" Sex? | Matthew Shallenberger

Everyone says Men NEED Sex... But What if that's Been a Lie All Along?


Join Sarah McDugal for this brutally honest conversation with Matthew Shallenberger about sex, needs, and how society (and church) have fed us a pack of lies. 

We'll be answering questions such as:
  • does the Bible support this idea that sex is a fundamental human need? If so, is it a male need, and why? 
  • how does the "sex as a need" philosophy impact a person's right to get sexual gratification? 
  • are sex and intimacy interchangeable? why or why not?
  • how can we reconcile our beliefs about sex as a *need* with what the bible teaches about love and the fruit of the spirit?
  • what can you do if you realize this dynamic is affecting your marriage?
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Matthew Shallenberger is a pastor, husband, and father. He is passionate about the intersection of biblical truth and social issues, and writes frequently about issues such as abuse and racism. His favorite book of the Bible is 1 John. Matthew and his wife, Emmalee, have two boys—Malachi, age 6, and Eli, age 4. He is a musician, a writer, and an avid fan of the St. Louis Cardinals. 

Ep12 | Video
Ep12 | Show Notes

Ep13 | How Traffickers + Pornographers + Domestic Abusers Operate the Same | Anne Basham

What do Human Traffickers, Porn Producers, and Domestic Abusers all Share in Common?


Join Sarah McDugal and Anne Basham for this eye-opening conversation about the shared mindset of traffickers, pornographers, and domestic abusers.

We'll be answering questions such as:
  • what is the difference between an abusive husband and a trafficker?
  • what is the connection between watching porn and human trafficking?
  • why do domestic abusers think the same way human traffickers do?
  • in what ways does porn create abusers?
  • how can you recognize an abusive mindset right around you?
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Anne Basham brings vast experience from her work at Anti-Trafficking International, and her years as the Senior Advisor at the Office for Victims of Crime (OVC) at the Department of Justice, the largest federal funder of anti-human trafficking efforts in the United States.

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this mind-blowing conversation!
It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep13 | Video
Ep13 | Show Notes

Ep14 | TraumaMama Resilience Tips | Nicole Stania + Lauren Rose

Practical Ways to Meet Your Kids' Needs When You're Triggered


Join Sarah McDugal with counselor Nicole Stania and survivor Lauren Rose, for a live interactive Zoom chat on ways you can build resilience after trauma -- when you have children.

We'll chat about:
  • how to ground your body when you're triggered as a parent.
  • tips to help you disengage and meet your kids' needs.
  • ways to cultivate healthy resilience in your children.
  • tips to help your kids transition between homes after trauma.
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Nicole is passionate about coming alongside others to find healing through Christ. Growing up in the foster care system, she is well acquainted with the impact of trauma. She has served in a variety of people helping roles including as a case manager at a detention facility, residential direct care staff, and mobile therapist. In addition to counseling through Foundations Christian Counseling Services, (her dream job!), she volunteers as an advocate/trainer with Called to Peace Ministries. She enjoys being outside, reading, homeschooling her four kids, and any kind of physical activity.

Lauren is a writer and speaker who is passionate about bringing hope and healing to survivors of abuse (domestic, sexual, and spiritual) through the truths of God’s Word and His love. She serves as a content strategist at Called to Peace Ministries.

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this practical, power-packed conversation!

Ep14 | Video
Ep14 | Show Notes

Ep15 | Recovering from Financial Abuse | Kelly Vogler

How Can I Get Back on my Feet After Financial Abuse?


Join Sarah McDugal and Kelly Vogler for practical, insightful, achievable tips on how to navigate the process of gaining financial stability after escaping abuse.

We'll be answering questions such as:
  • what does financial abuse look like in real life? how can I tell if I'm being financial abused?
  • what steps can I take to make a financial safety plan before I leave my abusive situation?
  • how can I establish financial stability and security after I've gotten safe? 
  • and SO MUCH MORE! 

Kelly Vogler is a survivor and financial mentor to women who have experienced abuse in dating relationships and marriage. She believes strongly that the more you know, the safer and wiser you can be. She hopes all our churches will someday be the safe and loving haven Jesus desires for all relationships.

Kelly holds a master’s in Leadership Education and Development from the University of Nebraska. She taught leadership at Union College for 8 years and is now Vice President of Operations for Agilx, a software development company. 

Kelly resides in Nebraska with her husband, Jeff, and their two dogs, Mocha and Lizzy. 

Grab your favorite something-hot-to-drink, and join us for this informative conversation!
It's going to be 🔥🔥🔥!

Ep15 | Video
Ep15 | Show Notes